Do you think it's normal to get frustrated from 1-on-1 meetings?
Irina Seng
21 replies
Replies
Angi Bowman@lucky__angi
Lucky Orange
Are you talking about manager/employee 1:1? If so, I would say it's not frustrating at all. We have a set agenda/pace in place, and that helps maximize the meeting. I also will admit that our overall goal may be different than what others use a 1:1 for.
When we have a 1:1, we first catch up on life outside of work. Lucky Orange is family-focused, and it carries through to the 1:1.
After that, I answer/discuss five specific questions with my boss:
>> What am I working on?
>> How are my OKRs going?
>> Is there anything impeding my work?
>> What do I need from her to be more successful?
>> How do I need to grow to achieve my career goals?
As a result, our meetings have a focus. It's not frustrating or stressful because we use the 1:1 as a way to reconnect, get back on track, and be open about the obstacles preventing me from working.
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Vectorly
Defiantly not ok to feel frustrated! Nether as a team leader nor as a team member.
Further
You either don't like the job or you're talking to the wrong person in this case. It's better to rethink your position I guess.
Wellbee
From my experience as a manager of 30+ peeps:
1. People are different, not everyone needs set 1on1's. Rather just have a quick chat with them in the office or go for lunch together.
2. Preparation is key. But the manager shouldn't set the agenda all the time, it's better for the team member to create the points that are important for him/her.
3. If you or the person are frustrated after meeting, then it's you didn't prepare enough.
4. Always trying informal places to meet. Walking, bar, or coffee shop works.
Yeah basically change place, let the person set the agenda, and both prepare.
People often have hard time with 1:1 meetings, but it doesn't mean that they should be frustrated.
I think there is a very clear solution for this problem - preparation. A decent preparation, at least, on meeting's agenda would eliminate much of frustration.
Obviously and not only 1-on-1 meetings but also those three to four tech interviews before getting a job. As a fresher, I faced these interviews and it was too tiring and irritating.
Did you mean customer 1:1s or manager/employee 1:1s?
Log Harvestor
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@kirank5a @irina_seng1 Wait so which one is it? :)
@kirank5a @irina_seng1 AHAHAH love it
Solomon: Ice cream or chocolate?
Irina: YES
Vectorly
Brief on Demand by Amy
When done right, both people should leave a 1x1 meeting feeling satisfied, not frustrated, but I guess 1x1 meetings can definitely go wrong sometimes.
@lior_galante_cohen yeah expetially if one of the two has little social skills or doesn't have empathy
No need to be upset at all! All that comes with us is experience. Take insights from what is happening and give thanks.
What I mainly find frustrating is have 1:1 introductory meetings via zoom. It's so challenging to get to know a person virtually and actually create a good connection. I guess just another challenge of Covid!
Brief on Demand by Amy
@rachel_levitz Couldn't agree more!
Thursday
@rachel_levitz hehe yes, introductory calls do tend to get a little bit awkward.
@lior_galante_cohen tell me about it!
Thursday
Not really. 1-1 meetings in my experience have generally gone well when both of us have outlined the meeting agenda and if there's conflict I find it easier to resolve in 1-1 setting. These are also great opportunities to connect with your team mate/ customer and build a a better relationship - especially with remote work.
I find 1-on-1 meetings to be the best meetings!
Talking in front of other 10 people that are little/no related to my project gets hard. Especially when you have to speak about the problems you are facing 1-on-1 meetings are the answer.
In my experience, 1:1 meetings can be awkward, especially on discovery calls. Proper planning for the meeting and keeping to this plan helps a lot.
I think the fact that a shift has had to made from in-person to remote communication has resulted in the majority of people being pushed out of their comfort zones, or more specifically, the familiarity of meeting in person. This has resulted in added stress at having to change from what was the norm.
That being said, I think that in general, the remote 1:1 meeting has been accepted and a lot of people, certainly those I communicate with, have adjusted well.
But there are those calls that can be painful. I think the frustration comes to the fore when communication breaks down and the point of the call is lost.
I would say it depends on the leader's attitude. In my career, I had situations where I felt frustrated before each 1on1 meeting and also had situations when 1on1 were totally fine. The difference between them was a leader. So if the leader is doing his job correctly then everything should be fine :)